The Only One

I work to, try to do better too
but this world won’t let me forget you
the many places that I’ve been
every reflection I see your face in
always was a part of me
my lover and my worst enemy
spiteful to me, yet full of empathy
twists my words so that I’m never heard
lay my head to rest each night
knowing we’ll just never get it right

and yet I love you so
don’t want you to go
cause you are the only one

do my best to keep you around
give you a ring, my key, my crown

I stay up all day and all night
I work, I put in work, I fight
I fight for no one, I fight for someone
I am lonesome, I am the only one
the sun no longer shines at my door
no, no, no, not anymore

I too many times played the fool
lost in my commitment to you
foolishly thinking I could of ever won
when every thing I did was wrong
if I ever expressed distress
I no longer received your best
I always pretended that I didn’t come second
and that we were equally each other’s blessing
I’m the knife in my own back
I’ve betrayed myself taking a look back
dragging my feet down your road
knowing it leads somewhere cold



what does it take
to undo our mistakes
restore your faith
in me, in you
can we, renew…

our meaning to one another
I love you like no other
so we have our ups and downs
but I always stick around
I don’t run from any adversity
cause at the end of the day
I still want you and me
you can trust that I’ll try
never do you have to ask why
I’m there for the good and bad
to show you a love you never had
we can make it all possible
my heart beats for everyone, but stops for you

what does it take to get through to you
that I only want you
I won’t settle for someone less
cannot accept second best
why should I become complacent
I can’t get over you
you have no replacement
and here I am
trying to make a statement
being the one man
persistent, trying to get through to you
but you’re resistant to something true

not ready for something long term
a commitment is not of your concern
so we pretend and we fake
like being together is a mistake
so we hold back
worried about how to react
to that denial in our hearts
not knowing where to start
we’ll keep flirting and denying
but I won’t keep lying
everyone knows that, it’s so easy to see
in all honesty, if we allowed us to be
there’s nothing more complete than you and me

Can’t Give You Up

you’re so worried you’ll lose your friends

but you will lose me in the process

because we can’t make mends

why are you so scared?

why are you worried?

after all of these years

don”t you think we would be prepared

why can’t we commit?

why do we bullshit?

we have so much chemistry after so many years

our relationship is not that of our peers

but if you choose me

you lose them?

why is this our current situation?


Think by treating me the same as everyone else

you are protecting yourself

I’m not just another friend in your life

so don’t think that’s what is right

or is that you can never love me?

something about me is so ugly?

are you just kind for kindness sake?

is any of this real or is it all fake?

tell me failure is not our fate

we are so loving and playful

so why can’t I date you?

do you hate me? or do you hate you?

do I lack depth?

is it our time together, you still regret?

or am I not tall enough? what is it?

can I call your bluff?

cause there’s no reason it should be so tough

not when we mean so much


you’re going to lose me if you don’t choose me

we both know that this day was coming

can’t forever chase a heart that keeps running…


so return to me

or just murder me

cause I don’t want to live without you

I can’t face a world without you in it

not for one minute

not without you in it

our time, maybe you can, but I can’t forget

so I can’t give you up yet

without giving up on everything else

without losing myself

Project RGB Epilogue: The End of Our Era

I wish you well and I wish you hell
for all the pain you put me through
but I try to believe this wasn’t you
that your heart had not yet healed
so I was only a rebound, nothing real
It was my decision to be fully invested
despite you telling me you can’t fully invest yet
so I admit my faults, and take some of the blame
but with your decisions, I hoped you’d do the same
I was patient and believed you were worth the wait
but you showed affection, you didn’t hesitate
you made it clear you wanted me here
but soon pretended like I wasn’t there
everything found a way to matter more than I did
and my frustration, I tried to hide it
to spare you any unnecessary stress
I gave my all, my best
so many good memories
all the moments you shared with me
but it went overshadowed and neglected
and I was left feeling disrespected
I always asked you to tell me to stop
if you needed more space or time
because I wanted you to find
yourself before anything with me
but you said you enjoyed your time with me
I wasn’t perfect, but I was always fair
and if you had really cared
the least you could of done
was say I’m not the one
rather than stringing me along
feeding me lies
never looking in my eyes
you used and manipulated me
but I was selectively blind not to see
I thought we had such a good thing
but once you were ready
you didn’t come to me, you went to him
so let this be our finale, this is our end
Goodbye R.G.B.
farewell former friend

This is the end of our era

22.) Swan Song

I gave you all I had
nothing more left in me
and it was sad to see
I’m not what you were looking for
being the guy that I am
I tried understanding your plan
but you gave me no closure
and I thought maturity came as we got older
but you had no regard for my pain
and it was such a shame
to witness how selfish you’ve become
every good thought of you being undone

After today, you just become a regret
my favorite one, I won’t forget
you are just a memory
to remind myself how you won’t remember me
how irrelevant I was to you
but still wished I got through to you
I invested so much
to get so little
barely felt your touch
my desire for you, a riddle
we never made sense together
but I wanted our elusive moments forever

If I knew this is how we would be leaving
I would have wanted you for all the wrong reasons
try to get inside you like every other guy
but I don’t know why
I saw so much potential
why I saw so much in you
but thank you for the memories
and the lessons learned
for igniting the fight in me
and the way my heart burned
If you ever came back
honestly don’t know how I’d react
I don’t know that I would say “no”
don’t know if I could tell you to “go”
you had such a big part of me
left me feeling so empty
nothing about our collapse made sense
and I was so into you
guess I couldn’t foresee what was so predictable
but you will never tell me the words I want to hear
and it’s time I move on…so goodbye my dear

21.) R.G.B.

I can say I loved you because I know you’ll never read this

every ounce of time with you was our little secret

you will never hear these words because you didn’t want to

had an interest in me, but didn’t want me to want you

I’ve written an album of songs because of you

through the good and the bad, I still find you beautiful

You were the hardest I ever fought for anything in life

a part of me believed that you could be my wife

but I was wrong about us for all that time

I was so much yours, but you were never mine

I was blinded and constantly reminded of your presence

I would of given you the world, shower you in presents

I thought all I had was going to be enough

you were a diamond, but your life was in the rough

and I wanted to be there to make it better

at least I thought we would do so together


Seduced by the passion of your kiss

so much about you I miss

I envied all that touched your body

just let me know that, to you, I am somebody

you left me mad, I was a man down

depression sets it knowing you’ll never come around

you made me feel Red, Green, Blue

I was so color blind in love with you


It all started when we finally stopped

resisting that feeling and took a shot

I was so consumed by you that I didn’t care

for so long, things between us didn’t seem fair

I made sure you had the best of me

and you took it upon yourself to let me

know I can’t have the best of you

now please, I’m begging, help me forget you

our time has expired, and my heart is past due

I thought we were mature, thought we could manage

but look at us now, so distant, so damaged

I guess you found what you were searching for

because your confidence in me is no more


I fought so hard, but you have no clue

of all the pain that you put me through

Every letter I sent that never got a response

All of them, you didn’t think twice to write back once?

All I needed was you in my life for my soul to be satisfied

but all I’m left with are questions and stains from the tears I cried

I tried to get through to you that everything will be ok

to provide your health and protection I prayed

I tried to show you that your life didn’t have to be a battle

but fighting was your forte so consequently you had to

declare war on what you can’t control and then complain

I still remained at your side to share your pain

I told you I could no longer do this alone

so you walked without once picking up the phone

to let me know that we are done

to let me know you always knew I wasn’t the one

found it ok to leave me without closure

to this day, you never told me it was over

but with you, I will always remember

that during all that time, I deserved better

17.) I Knew it was Over (Blue)

Be jealous of how much my heart broke because of you

remember how much it pained me when I lost you

because now you know how much I truly cared

and it answers your question of why no good men are out there

you throw them away and I was another victim

with me one day, next thing, you’re with him

you didn’t want to hurt or let me down

but instead made me look and feel like a clown

still, I don’t hold it against you

everyone thinks Its my right to resent you

but I can’t do that

something holds me back

even if I’m I’m angry and upset

I still don’t have an ounce of regret

I complain then defend your name

because I choose to feel your pain


I knew it was over when you couldn’t love me

felt it the last time you hugged me

our last kiss, I knew it was our last

that moment, I knew I became your past


you held grudges that kept us apart

there was a darkness still left in you heart

and I wasn’t the remedy to help you heal

so I hoped, but knew that you would never feel

for me in a way that would matter

but still, I didn’t expect my heart to shatter

the way it did, my bid for you wasn’t enough

I couldn’t convince you that I was enough

there was the time you drank too much

so hungover the next day, you stood me up

cancelled on us, what you did was so wrong

but guess your admission of guilt was a turn on

cause I stuck around to fall for it again

pretending I didn’t know this was our end


You stopped looking me in the eyes

feeling guilty from all of your lies

but you still continued, didn’t you?

I wasn’t worth being true to

I caught on to them, but never called you out

because I wasn’t looking for a way out

I pushed myself to hold on

knowing you were so wrong

knowing we were so wrong

but I wanted you for so long

I kept going, knowing I was so wrong

we were so wrong